If You Love Something,

"If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it's yours. If it does not come back, it was never meant to be."

- Unknown

I think there is a lot of truth to this quote.  When you let go of trying to control another person it sets everyone free.

To me there is nothing more cruel than to be in a relationship with someone who always seems to have a bag packed with one foot out of the door.  This person makes it obvious that they are not willing to work on the issues that create chaos in the relationship.  It's also very immature because adults will usually try to work on their relationship even if it means seeking the help of a counselor or therapist.

No partner is perfect but if a person feels that their partner would literally "take a bullet for them" then maybe that person is not all that bad.  Maybe some increased communication will help the partnership go up a level. Sometimes the best partners are the silent type who don't always say things that build their partner's self esteem or ego.  Is it that person's job to always build up their partner's ego with flattery and compliments? Not really.  If a partner has to have their ego fed constantly the issues are with them not their partner who is probably just trying to "keep it all together." It's difficult living with a Narcissist. When the entire household must revolve around the wants and needs of one person there cannot be peace and harmony.

It's not always the male in the relationship that wreaks havoc. Sometimes it's the female. When I watch the reality TV shows with "Wives" on the end of the title I shake my head in disgust. Most of these women have no idea what a real woman is or how she behaves.  I don't care how much "bling," designer clothes and accessories, fantastic homes and cars these women have, they are not "Ladies." In our current society "Lady" has become a dirty word associated with elderly women who live by ancient societal rules.  That's really a shame because a Lady is someone who respects herself as well as others. A Lady holds the door for an elderly person, writes Thank You notes instead of texting or e-mailing, wears clothing that doesn't reveal too much, says "Please and Thank You" and respects her partner no matter what is going on at the time.

When a partner acts like they want to leave they could get "set free" by surprise. No one can be happy living as if they are on the edge of the Grand Canyon all of the time.  Eventually they must decide if they will be happier with or without their partner.  That is when real growth begins.